Sorry, United Kingdom, But Sucking Face With Katy Perry Is Pretty Much Inevitable

Just do like I did and give in. Give in to Katy Perry. Let her slide on top of you, jam her Sapphic tongue into your mouth and Hoover your molars like an aardvark with its snout up Joss Stone's vagina at a church picnic.Katy Perry is a conqueror. She'll rule your land like she's ruled mine. She's got one leg wrapped around Big Ben and one over the shoulders of the Golden Gate Bridge. Say a prayer for everything in between.Do we wish something else had made it to #1 this week? Sure.